Red Sox fan with stupid mustache cheers even though he has stupid mustache

After the Red Sox took the lead last night, before they lost it, a man with a dumb mustache thought it was okay to start cheering. Little did he know that his dumb mustache would make it on live TV.

We couldn't talk to him, but we did manage to talk to another guy who also has a dumb looking mustache. His name is Cheech.

"Yeah, I have one. Looks idiotic, but I grow it anyway. This guy obviously thought that he wasn't going to be on TV. He looks like a fool."

We were not sure what he was doing when A-Rod hit the home run, but we are guessing he wasn't cheering. We will keep you posted if someone let's us know.

PS- The Yankees are getting exciting to watch again. Get great New York Yankees Tickets here. Get great seats at great prices.


Jeter engaged to 23 year old? Does she get a ring or Ring Pop?

That is the latest rumor from a jeweler in NYC.

Meet Hannah Davis.

She enjoys cartoons, silly bandz, princesses and dolls.


A-Rod adds "Rat" to his list of accomplishments

60 Minutes is reporting some juicy stuff.

“60 Minutes” has learned that members of New York Yankees third baseman Alex Rodriguez’s inner circle in February obtained and leaked documents that implicated Milwaukee Brewers slugger Ryan Braun as well as his own Yankees teammate, catcher Francisco Cervelli, in the doping scandal that has enveloped Major League Baseball.

The leak came just days after the weekly newspaper Miami New Times published documents in January detailing Rodriguez’s pervasive use of performance enhancing drugs."

This should go over well...


It's stretch time

There seems to be some idea that the Yankees have a chance to go post season in 2013, but lest anyone get comfortable, remember what must take place OUT OF the Yankees' control: There are FIVE teams currently ahead of the Yankees for the wild card spots, therefore the Yankee must pass FOUR of them, but two are in the Central and one is in the West, so the limited chances to go head to head will almost certainly make things hugely difficult. Also, the teams above the Yankees in the East have been very consistent all year (Tampa and Baltimore).

Cleveland somehow is one of the teams, and from history, we can feel secure they will fold ... unless they score a coup of a deal by the 31st. But Kansas City is a team on the rise and may be good enough to stay in this race.

Out West, Oakland (many sportswriters' picks to win it all this year) leads in the WILD card race, so to the sportswriters (I agree), they will almost certainly win one of those wild cards (or the division)!
Texas, after having gotten hot in the last two weeks, were just inches ahead of Oakland for the division lead, and they could switch places easily, down the stretch.

The Yanks are currently 6 1/2 games behind Tampa Bay for the SECOND wild card, and if you think 6 1/2 games are easy to make up in 6-7 weeks, remember that the Yankees will need to do it without the leader coming back to them! And that's because if Tampa Bay should fold, someone ELSE will immediately take their place as the second wild card and the Yankees will be back to needing to do it themselves.

With that in mind, here is the easiest scenario for us: Tampa suddenly only plays .500 ball the rest of the way, and other teams do not take advantage, meaning they also falter, a very long odds possibility.


Forgiveness???


A few days ago, another would be terrorist was sentenced to thirty years for trying to blow up the federal reserve building in lower Manhattan, mere meters from the NY Stock Exchange!

He and his lawyer had this big, rambling apology that was supposed to sound so convincing ...

Judges have their jobs because they've heard it all. They are experienced at listening to BS apologies and/or family members swearing how innocent or sorry the perp "really" is.

Yes, what they're really sorry about was getting caught! (This putz had plans to do away with OTHER bastions of US commerce, too!)

How does this relate to the Yankees?

Well, who doesn't forgive Mo for blowing a save for the third time this season? After all, Adam Dunn drilling a pitch to the opposite field in the clutch to tie or win a game can be counted on the digits of a guy's genitalia!
(After two perfect strikes on the low outside corner, Mo got one just a tad more over the plate, still low, but Dunn, who is a dead pull hitter, was in swing to protect mode, and even then, the ball had "eyes", just as easily could have been a grounder to third or short!)

But when the Yankees re-took the lead in extra innings, and they no longer could go to Mo,  the rest of the relief world goes into "nerves" mode, the result of which was a Chicago walk-off for the three game sweep. And remember, Chicago was 0-10 coming into that series! Ugh!  Mo is forgiven, and the only reference made backward to that moment will be from some dipstick media person with a microphone in Mo's face!


Johnny Damon talks about A-Rod during 2009 WS

Here is what he said.

“I really haven’t sat down and thought that far, but if that’s how he was able to hit in the postseason, then yeah, absolutely. Then you start going and saying, ‘Was anyone (else) on their team cheating?’

“There’s just so many different factors that determine if a team wins, and A-Rod was a huge determining factor. He was the MVP of the ALCS. He played a pretty huge part. Unfortunately, through the years, guys winning awards have been linked to something.”


Idiot fisherman warns MLB of shark sightings in ball parks

As the weather continues to get warmer, more and more sharks have been seen at grocery stores, music festivals, and swimming near the shores of places where people swim and vacation.

"I didn't plan on seeing Jaws in the water." said Eric Tails who crapped his pants while vacationing in Cape Cod. "I just hoped that sharks weren't attracted to my poop. They wasn't and I am hear to tell the tale."

We are now learning that fisherman Hank Barnacles, who has been trying to learn if Great Whites suffer from depression for some dumb reason, is trying to warn the public about the possibility that a shark could end up at a baseball game.

"I waste a lot of time and money trying to figure out meaningless stuff about sharks. You've heard people say that anything is possible right? That is all I am saying." he said.

Although the likely hood of a shark getting a ticket to a game is rare, we are not counting it out.

"Have you seen the pictures on Yahoo of that kayaker? Do you think he expected it? I think that Granderson would be just as shocked if he saw a dorsal fin go by on the field. I am just saying, it could happen and we should be ready." he added.

Barnacles, who smells of rotten fish, never considered the possibility that sharks don't go on land and probably couldn't fit through the turnstiles, but he said he will stop at nothing to make sure his message gets to MLB.

"We have to prevent the next attack, even if it is at a stadium near you." he concluded


The True Deterioration of Media

So, Ryan Braun (who skated on a technicality, while throwing his specimen collector under the bus) has accepted suspension for the remainder of the year. Since HE negotiated it, that ends it. No admission of guilt (remember Nolo Contendere from Nixon's first VP?) is made, but the punishment is identical.

Eleven other MLB players accepted 50 game suspensions, without appeal.

So why is A-Rod being offered 220 game suspension? And why does the collective media think we are all nine year olds?

For crying out loud, Bernie Madoff was treated more fairly than A-Rod, and Madoff stole BILLIONS. A-Rod pumped himself up and did he "steal" millions, or did he use his enhanced physicality to EARN million that the Yankees were only too glad to pay for those stats?

So now A-Rod has appealed his suspension, and thanks to the collective media "mistrying" him in the court of public opinion, he must try to play out his remaining games as the pariah of baseball.

Assume for a moment that he is as guilty as sin with regards to taking HgH. Then, why is he appealing this?

DUH! Seven weeks penalty for eleven others, and FIFTY-NINE weeks penalty for A-Rod!

Then, even Michael Kay (his own team's announcer) drops a dime on him by saying (on-the-air) that if he is innocent, then why won't he just claim such in an interview? (That's probably a case of Kay reverting to his old days as writer for the New York Post where one of his duties was to address football betting lines, telling readers which way to BET on games! Nice resume' there! The scandal mongering never leaves the blood?)

Bachelor of Arts from Fordham - hmmm- did you major in finishing sentences with prepositions?

A-Rod of course, refused to answer because he now has an ersatz legal case, and anything he says WILL be used against him! (IMO, he just wants the same seven week penalty offered the other eleven players.)


Is it a Witch hunt against ARod? Broom salesman says yes

Alex Rodriguez is finally back in the Yankees lineup, and Yankees fans everywhere are thrillled to have him around again. The team barely functioned without him. ARod has been suspended for 211 games but has appealed. Meanwhile a handful of other players are agreeing to just go away, so why can't ARod?

Is Bud Selig and MLB launching a witch hunt aimed at targeting ARod? We asked Ted Quigsly what he thought.

"It's a witch hunt." Quigsley said. "Look I make my living selling brooms, so who else would know more about witches than me? Plus I married one, wink wink. Trust me, Selig has a vendetta against ARod. Maybe because he's so good looking, I don't know. Seems odd that he got 211 games when the other players got 50."

I think that's because its the 20th time he's cheated.

"The guy is an all star. He should be in the Hall of Fame. Down with Selig!"

ARod returned last night and went 1 for 4. Since he earns about 50k an at bat, its a pretty smart decision to appeal and hold out as long as he can.


Matt Garza and the billygoat gruff

Everyone knows the tale of the billygoat gruff. Something about cute little goats trying to cross a bridge that a mean troll lives under.

The Matt Garza tale is a little different.

You see boys and girls...once upon a time there was a mediocre pitcher named Matt Garza, who had a giant clump of hair on his chin like a billygoat would.

Matt Garza is a mean old jerk, and that's why he's played for several teams in a short career - no one ever wants to keep him around!

Matt Garza can't field so smart teams get the idea to bunt against him, and this makes Matt Garza mad.

One day, after a bunt by Eric Sogard drove a run in, Sogard's wife, Princess Kaycee posted a tweet: "Get em on get em over and get em in!"

This made Matt Garza super angry. Rather than work on his fielding, he threw a temper tantrum and posted a tweet himself. "@KayceeSogard tell your husband to speak up so his wife doesn't have to do it for him ... Chumps! ... Hahaha!...Certain people can't shut there woman up!"

Later on, Matt Garza had to apologize, but he proved what a mean old nasty troll he is.

But the A's will win the division and live happily ever after...until they get swept out of the playoffs like they always do.

The End.


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