"Its plain and simple. Give me my money back." he said to a crowd of two people and a poster of Mariah Carey. "He was supposed to be a Yankee for life and that didn't happen. I want redemption i says... REEEEDEEMMPTTIOOOON!."
We aren't sure why the man is taking to social media with his complaint. I mean, if he has a receipt the store will probably just honor his request.
"It's the point of the matter. Cano wasn't supposed to take the extra 70 million. Instead, he was supposed to play on the Yankees. What am I gonna do with this jersey. What I asks you?."
What would add insult to injury is if Robinson Cano and his new team beating them the next time they both face off.
"Absolutely. I mean it crossed my mind a bunch of times. Why wouldn't it? It is a very valid reason. What am I supposed to do now? What am I supposed to do? Wear a Brendan Ryan jersey? I guess Jeter will play for at least another 5 years, so I can get that"
We weren't sure what to tell him, seeing that Jeter just announced his retirement. What did Jeets have to say that he wants to do after retirement?
“There are many things I want to do in business and philanthropic work, in addition to focusing more on my personal life and starting a family of my own,” he added. “And I want the ability to move at my own pace, see the world and finally have a summer vacation.”
Stay tuned to see what jersey this guy decides to get next, if the store will give back his money or if Cano will weigh in on it.
Think of it what you will, but Derek Jeter's announced retirement at the end of this season doesn't mean he can't play anymore. (Another .190 average might)
Derek said this should help the team going forward because they won't have any distractions about 2015. (Or, he wants to do the grand tour like his great buddy Mariano did, last year.)
I think it's a combination of things, the latter items mentioned, plus only Derek knows the true and lasting effect of his ankle injury, a type of injury which does not easily heal at his age.
His leadership skills may help him through the rough times. So unless he is far South of the "Mendoza" line, expect Jete to DH more often as the team tries out potential replacements, or trades for the next shortstop.
The closer we get to Derek's last day, if I live to see it, I will well up, having seen him during his first cup of coffee in 1995.
Then, I'm guessing, it will be time for another uniform retirement ceremony, (Since Joe Torre will be there, maybe the Yankees should spring for two retirement ceremonies.)
Non-breaking news - Tanaka either had trouble getting a smaller plane or he's ostentatious - He flew chartered here using a 787 (full size jetliner) and his entourage was no more than ten or twelve. I hope he got his ass out of town before the storm strikes. Florida, here he comes..
Today, they replayed an earlier game from last year in which Tanaka pitched. Odd that the three hits against him were all crisply struck, but he looked so hit-able I thought it was just liked Catfish Hunter!
Now if he overcomes the change in ball size ...
Of course, few mention that he will now be pitching in larger stadiums and also without astroturf. That's in his favor.
Despite limited credentials, our crack reporter was able to do what no other media person was able to - sit down for a one on one interview with Seahawks running back Marshawn Lynch.
Our reporter was sure to ask the really important questions that all the top reporters ask.
BG: Are you happy to be playing in the Superbowl?
BG: Do you expect the Seahawks to beat the Broncos?
BG: If Seattle scores more points than Denver, do you think they will win?
BG: Do those dreadlocks get hot in the summer?
Well there you have it
The Superbowl this year will be played at Giants Stadium and sports experts have been debating if having the championship decided in cold and snow is fair.
One fan, Quint Bottomsworth, who isn't an expert at anything, not only thinks a cold weather Superbowl is great but wants baseball to do the same.
"No more of this back and forth between the cities of the teams playing. It's time these million dollar cry babies man up." Quint told us. "I say we make a World Series Field in Kaktovik. It will be great!"
Where the hell is Kaktovik?
"Uh gee, it's the northern most point in Alaska stupid. The average temperature is 2 degrees. It once got to -65. And they have Polar Bears. Make these wimpy ball players man up and earn their keep."
Sources confirmed, no one at MLB is even considering Quint's proposal.
Man bets on Pro Bowl, then realizes he has gambling problem
Sherman Crackers of Watertown NY has been betting on games his whole life. His success rate at winning is 7% and he prides himself on consistency. Some of his buddies told him that Sportsbook Review has a complete rating guide that could help him out, but he never seems to listen to anyone.
"I once won $4,000. I think I am doing pretty darn good for myself." he said.
As we talked to a little longer we quickly realized that he may have won $4,000, but in total, he has lost $284,000. In other words, he is kind of in the hole for $280,000. That is a Lamborghini for Pete's sake.
"Big freaking deal. So my kids won't be able to go to college. People are skipping it anyway now a days." added Sherman, who bet his school tuition that he would graduate. As you can probably tell, he lost that too. "I think that I am a new aged person
It wasn't until Sunday that he realized that he may have a problem. No one even watches the game, more less bets on it. What a fool.
"Well, I guess the fact that I bet on the worst, most useless game in the universe and lost, woke me up a bit." he added. "I've woken up with my face in pizza boxes before, so I know how low I can go. Hey that rhymes."
With that interview, we did come to the realization that at least one person actually watched the game. We are guessing that is probably the extent of it. Most were watching the Grammys and we were in total shock that people actually bet on the Pro Bowl. Betting on the Pro Bowl is like betting on a sitcom. They are both fake. Anyway, Let's see if Sherman can stay strong during the Super Bowl.
A rumor that was started by a completely unreliable source is saying that Cano also worked in a trip to the Grammys in his contract.
"I definitely think he could have or not done this." Said expert detail mixer upper Don Hanigans. "If he did, he is positioning himself good. I think or not."
It looked like Cano had some fun... and wouldn't you if you were making 240 Million?
Gomes speaks. Well kind of.
"He does steroids or whatever, it sucks. He does this or that, it sucks. He's always in the news, it sucks," the Red Sox left fielder told the Boston Herald. "But this is
the players' union he's going against. It's all of us. Not a real good idea."
"I said what I said," Gomes said. "I'm not trying to make anything or [say] it was taken out of context or all these riff raffs that people want to come up with. First of all, to have a rivalry, there has to be a villain. Why not pick the big guy with tattoos and a big beard or Mohawk and plays the game how he plays. Boom, let's pick that guy for the villain. That's pretty easy. But what did I say? I think the Yankees is one of the most professional organizations that you can get.
"It's not talking trash. It's just questions. Are they questions? Sure. I don't think I talk trash by any means. I don't talk trash. ... I think with 10 years in the big leagues it's a little late for a character check to Jonny Gomes and try and make me into the villain that I'm not."
Idiots react to the signing of Tanaka.
"I hope he isn't the same as Kei Igawa or Irabu. That would stink. We don't need no freaking bum who eats up our money."
~Sal - Who wears Yankee everything.
Our response to Sal: Why are you only comparing Tanaka to other Japanese pitchers? Carl Pavano and Randy Johnson sucked for us too!
"I am going to wear my "Got Rings" T-Shirt tomorrow at work. It's gonna be freaking awesome. There are a bunch of Red Sox fans there. I am going to go up to them and just point at the rings bitches..."
~ Luke, a complete fool who still gets heated over the Boston rivalry even though he is 49 years old.
Our response to Luke: No one cares about your "Got Rings" shirt. Stop living in the past.
"Addition of Tanaka very very good. He pitch long time and very well. He restore honor to Yankee and Yankee fans."
~ Patrick O'Sullivan - Irish pub owner
Our response: Sure.
The comments will continue to roll in. What do you think of this signing?
New book from the writers of Bronx Goblin!
About the book:
Ever eat? work? Shop? Use a public bathroom? or Drive anywhere? Did you ever encounter someone and say to yourself.. "What an Idiot!" Did you say yes? Did you expect a response from me? If so, I apologize. This is a book and I can't respond to you, but I 'hear ya.' "Idiots Are Everywhere" is divided into 10 sections, each filled with comical analysis and invented interviews designed at capturing the mindset of everyday people as they go about their lives and are forced to interact with others. You may never look at a normal situation again after reading this book.
We appreciate your support and want to sell more copies than Oprah or Rachel Ray.