Idiot fan: The Pope resigned over PED allegations

With all of the speculation answered, Pope "Eggs" Benedict resigned because he is too old to travel and health concerns. Even with all of that confirmed information, Idiot fan and conspiracy theorist Jake Jakesly says that the Pontiff resigned over PED allegations.

"I think he wanted to get an edge. You know, say his prayers faster, fight radical religions better. You know, stuff like that." added Jake.

With all of the questions answered we asked why Jake thinks there is still some questions about the resignation.

"I just think it is weird that he is resigning close to the big event of Easter. Maybe he doesn't want to be forced in the limelight when he finds the hidden Easter eggs faster than in previous years? I don't know, just seems weird." he added.

We are not sure why Jake feels so strongly, but we think the Pope has made a good decision. As for Jake, he is trying to start a movement of followers.

"I opened up a tweeter account and have a bunch of stuffed animal friends that listen to me." he added.

Not only is Easter fast approaching, but Spring Training is here.


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