Honest Frank says A-Rod should give the Yankees a refund

Once again Alex Rodriguez has been linked to cheating and steroid use, though after last year's dismal season one would think that would be impossible.

A-Rod is still owed over 5 trillion dollars from the Yankees. Long time baseball fan and President Lincoln stalker, "Honest" Frank Camry, has had enough. We sat down with him in his log cabin for an interview.

"I can't stand the deception." Frank told us. "It's the deception that bothers me. I cannot tell a lie so i find cheating distasteful."

Isn't I cannot tell a lie George Washington?

"Behold! What seems like four score and many years ago the Yankees landed this fraud. He has done them no good! Get thee to a nunnery!!!!"

That's not Lincoln either, it's from Hamlet.

"Mr. Rod should refund all ill gotten gains to the Yankees at once. He has placed a wall up around himself and his fans. Mr. Rod...tear down this wall!!!"

I think Reagan said that.

"Look I'm sloppy with my quotes okay?"

You must have been excited for the Lincoln movie that just...

"LIES!!!!! ALL LIES!!!!!!!! Come with me."

Frank led us to his bedroom where thousands of $5 bills were tacked to the walls. Each one had the eyes carved out.

We got the hell out of there.


MATSUIFAN INC. 2007